Tom 2011/10/05(Wed)20:45 No. 356251 ID: c811c4
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There are 3 targets I can think of. Plenty more targets that Muo can mess with, but the lizardmen are already in fine disarray, and the Naga down there, well, there just isn't much of a civilization to screw with! So on and so forth, so here's a few I'm interested in.

Elven Retreat - Elves. Muo talked to her sidekick about it, and apparently they live in trees that are magically formed, during growth, to make adequate housing. They actually hate anything artificially made out of wood. Also, Muo insists that her elf friend was an exception, and that he told her they were proud and haughty to a fault, to a point that it is impossible to exaggerate.

Goblin Tower - Muo informs me there's a cave path that leads underground to the bottom entrance of a goblin tower co-led by a pair of demons. Awesome. That's all she knows, as the goblins usually keep overground.

A Dwarven Fort - On the opposite side of the mountain we have a fortress of dwarves. They practically export shenanigans, but still manage to be a simmering pot of explosive drama.

So! What would you say is the best target for Muo's mayhem?

goblin tower first, we make them atatck the dwarves. then we convince the dwarves it was the elves' fault! MUHAHAHAHA

Dorf fort: A little TOO easy. Just run around killing pets and pulling levers. Way too simple.

Goblin Tower: Pfft. Already chaotic enough.

Elf home: Oh man. OH MAN. A chance to stick it in the face of elf stuckupishness and make them look like fools? DO WANT.

I think we messed with the dorfs enough when we made the booze waterfall, albeit in a separate dimension/universe/state of existence.

I vote for Goblins. They have explosives.

Tom 2011/10/05(Wed)20:52 No. 356255 ID: c811c4
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>>356252
I like, I like! This is now Option #4, available for voting.

>>356255
What's that wine made of?

I say we go yank around the elves.

i'd say either elves or dwarves with the mission of establishing diplomatic relations. I know that short term the plan of trying to get people to stop treating the slimes like monsters won't generate as much chaos as starting a war, but the last chaos god lost his job more or less for being too much of a dick. besides if you make a point of actually helping those who follow you, you get more followers.

Goblins.

>>356256
He's about to lay Minci while he does his job of course, like a real professional. Making it all romantic with the wine and all, you dig? It wouldn't be much trouble seeing him also set up a nice candle set and chaotic turkey dinner.

You know what would make that turkey dinner more tasty? Chaos. Choas to those prudish elves. Who apparently will use arrows made from trees artificially, unless they grow arrow trees that grow 'em like fruit.

>>356252
Can it be considered chaotic when (while disorderly) it is already the natural order of things?

Could get some more followers from the goblin tower. Nothing wins over the heart of a goblin more than a giant orgy of chaos.

But as for option #4 how on earth would we convince dwarves that goblins are elves?

>>356262
ah, but it is not. they are all waiting for the chance to strike that will never come.

>>356263
nono, say the goblins attacked BECAUSE of the elves.

>>356263
nah see. we convince the dwarves that the elves convinced the goblins to attack them.

Option #4

>>356255
So, Tom, how's Chee doing?
Also, have you deputized Minci as a lesser goddess of chaos or something?

Also, you need to set up a chaos bureaucracy that runs everything for you just so you can proceed to completely ignore it and cause whatever hijinks you want.

Option 4

Option 4 all the way.

Gimme option 4

Option 4, and we can get the Goblins to ally with the Slimes because Chaos, and on the other side we have the Dwarves liking the Slimes because they don't like the elves, especially since Muo will be in the fray.

We must option four do.

Yes!

Most-Chaos option is best option.

Therefore, Option 4.

we should sound out how our follower feels about this. she likes us right now but she seems like the sort to have a problem with being used to cause the kind of mass deaths a war would bring.

#4 looks more like God of War territory.

How about we take a less conventional definition of chaos, and grant the goblins a way to make a super-brew that no dorf could resist, give the elves a gadget/explosive no goblin could ignore, and the dwarves an impossible eco-friendly craft no elf could deny.

Hmm, you know, if this DOES spark off an actual war, it would be kindof bad. Isn't that sort of thing why the previous God of Chaos got put to bed?

Tom 2011/10/06(Thu)02:59 No. 356298 ID: c811c4
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>>356256
No idea what wine it is. It's for Minci.

>>356271
No idea how Chee's doing either, no one around her has found any shrines. As for Minci, well, no. She's pretty peaceful. It's a shame, she'd be pretty good at it, I think! Ah well, she's the consort of the Chaos God, that's pretty good.


As for the main reason I'm showing my mug again, I'm telling you guys that I will aim to keep the things relatively salvageable between the dwarves and elves, if Muo actually tries to pull off #4.

The idea would be to hit that middle ground where some elves and dwarves want war, and some won't. Maximize the conflict of interest and all that, and get a lot of fighting about war! If they all agreed to go to war, well, it's a bit too simple, and if they annihilate one another, that'll end in the least chaos. Dead factions don't stir.

Anyways, don't let me get in the way, the voting is still going on.

Hi Minci!

Well, if I recall correctly, Dwarf territory is right next door to Chee's encampment. Maybe Muo could build a shrine for you to help expand or whatever.

you know in this real world the focus is more than just our continent, there's other places that were the original real world before the gods rewrote it to have our fake world in the real one. Muo could be on either and the dwarven territoy could be on the other side of the planet from Chee.

For fighting about having a war, we need to sow friendly threads between the dorfs and elves, then make the powerful snotty noble dwarfs who generally command the others hate the elves, same with the elves so they'll be some infighting.

>>356292
I like the idea of turning the elves' water supply to high quality booze.

option 4, yo.

>>356298
Man, you've really got this chaos thing down. I wonder if they'll reconsider having Chee take the job? I guess it depends on if she's still reluctant to take up the mantle after her mortal life is over. Also, tell Minci we said hi! Give her a hug for us!

I still just want to mess with the elves. Option 4 is ambitious, so much that I don't have the foggiest notion how we'd pull it off.

Option 4 isn't even an option. It's a plan of what to do when we choose option 2 wth.

I'm in favor of screwing with the elves, yeah. So, option 4, or option 1.

option 4

1/5 Tom 2011/10/06(Thu)15:08 No. 356379 ID: c811c4
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>Hug Minci

>>356300
As was mentioned, there's a whole wide world outside of Chee's island. It could be around the dwarf fortress, but most likely not.

>>356365
The way I see it, it's "all of the options, starting with number 2."

It's decided, then! Option 4. No, I have no idea how we - Muo - is going to pull that off. That's no biggie, I like to see people try stuff just as much as people succeeding! So, let's go check on how she's doing.

2/5 Tom 2011/10/06(Thu)15:08 No. 356380 ID: c811c4
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Oh, good, she's already up. Not awake, but up.

3/5 Tom 2011/10/06(Thu)15:09 No. 356381 ID: c811c4
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"MUO WAKE UP I HAVE A MISSION FOR YOUUU."

>"AHHHHHHH"

"Haha. But seriously, mission. Go to the goblin place, get them to attack the dwarves, and tell them the elves made them do it."

4/5 Tom 2011/10/06(Thu)15:09 No. 356382 ID: c811c4
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>"Um, what?! That's insane!"

"That's why it's a great idea."

>"Well, how am I supposed to do that?"

"Hey, I'm just the spectator that throws you a bone now and again. And there's no idea bone."

>"I'll... try?"

"That's the spirit."

5/5 Tom 2011/10/06(Thu)15:11 No. 356384 ID: c811c4
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Later...

>This is it, the last stretch of tunnel that goes to the Tower's basement. Oh, and I'm going to absorb the necklace for now to hide it, because I don't know what they think of chaos subjects.

>"Ey! Don't get too close, slime. We don't have a tourism encouragement program in place, if you catch the drift." the male goblin says.
>"Told ya we'd see some creatures crawling around out of their element after that lizard place got stirred up." the female one states.
>"Um, excuse me, but what do I have to do to get through?" Muo asks.
>"A present. A token of your well-intent, you might say. Make it good, you look like you've got a few fine items on you." says the male.

>I don't want to give up my items, they were all presents!
Casted - Random Effect Level 2

At this level, I can't summon permanent items through that spell, but it'll last long enough for her to get through. That's assuming we get Muo through by way of present, of course.

cake!

>>356384
I know. Summon up a gold box, with DO NOT OPEN on it.

If they open it, BOOM it explodes into glue.

>>356384
>That's assuming we get Muo through by way of present, of course.
That sounds hopelessly lame. How about making all three of them incredibly high instead?

the air around their heads makes them incredibly high.

>>356388

this. with enough glue to cover their mouths.

>>356384
A finely crafted ivory dildo. It menaces with spikes of ivory. It is engraved with an image of a goblin and a goblin. The goblins are wrestling.

Swords and Shields turn into Fine Jewelry.

>>356399
Yes. Yes. Go on.

>>356399
This.

Tom 2011/10/06(Thu)16:24 No. 356404 ID: c811c4
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One golden box shaped like a cake. Also, the candles make the three of them high. Why not? May as well loosen them up. Why not throw in another item, too.

....

>"So then I turned it into a badger!" Muo says.
>"Ha, no way! You know, we're s'posed to just take your stuff and then act like it was always ours, ya know? Assumin' the person we take it from is weaker, mind ya. In fact, where is yer stuff? An' why're you starin' at the wall?" the female asks.
>"I dunno! But you didn't take it, did you? You'll let me through?"
>"Eh, why not. I doubt you could cause much trouble."
>"And will you be my companion and lemme see your demon leaders an' talk to them?" says Muo.
>"Ehhhhhh, you didn't get through my post, understand?"
>"But I did."
>"No, you didn't. Do you get me?"
>"But I did!"
>"You didn't."
>"I did!"

As nice as it is seeing Muo high, we've reached a bit of a stalemate.

make her feel scoundrely. is that an emotion? you know, when you get into this mindset of being all pokerfaced and clever and tricking people?

give her more cunning again. she seems to not be getting the "nudge nudge wink wink"

>>356404
The candles now produce a potent hallucinogenic.

We could just give her a direct message, that they're letting her through but she shouldn't say they did.

>>356413
That would be silly. Muo is not meant to be our puppet here, she's a semi-independent agent that we give power and encourage to cause chaos. Explaining everything to her and telling her exactly what to do ruins the fun.

We need to figure out how to increase her piety, by the way. It's not going up, and that troubles me.

1/2 Tom 2011/10/06(Thu)17:37 No. 356418 ID: c811c4
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>Cunning/Conning

>"Ohh. I get youu. Still, I'd like you to come with me to the demon!"
>"Only way I'm coming with you is to make you our prisoner, lady."
>"Fine, then I'll take my stuff and go upstairs!"

2/2 Tom 2011/10/06(Thu)17:39 No. 356419 ID: c811c4
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Up at the Tower's first flopor...

>"I need to sell a few items!" Muo says.
>"Sure sure. Except, are you sure these aren't our weapons? This just screams that one of our guards down below got into a little misunderstanding." the shopkeep says.
>"I found the weapons and shields in the dungeons, they could have been yours a long time ago! Do I look like I could have "misunderstood" your guards?"
>"Whaaatever. I'll give you 20 gold for both shields and swords. How about it?

Casted: Random Effect Lv. 2

Her head now appears to be on fire, but it isn't.

This can be made permanent, if you people would like.

Goblins shirt: evaporate

shield now appears to be solid admantium.

>>356419
Muo gets super-cute puppy dog eyes for the next couple hours.

>>356422

this, but also the sword. if adamantium doesn't exist, make it mithril or orichalcum or whatever super awesome metal exists.

>>356419
The shopkeeper now has a fetish for inanimate objects
and that sword and shield is looking fine

Look again. The gold is now diamonds.

>>356430

I like it.

1/3 Tom 2011/10/06(Thu)19:17 No. 356445 ID: c811c4
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>"Look at them again, miss! They're pure adamantium!
>"You wouldn't be the first one to try to pass off a regular weapon as adamantium, right? Think about that again. 20 gold pieces." the shopkeeper says.
>"...that'll be fine yes!"
>"Thought so."
>"I'd like to see your demon leaders, please!"
>"No can do. You either gotta beat one of our elite soldiers, or I guess prisoners see them often enough."
>"Is that soooo. I'm just wondering, then... where do you guys keep your water? I'm really thirsty."
>"Our well is just out in back, but you might have to pay." says the shopkeeper.
>"That's fine, thank you!" Muo says.
>"Yeah, get out of here, I need to go sort out this equipment in the back room!"

2/3 Tom 2011/10/06(Thu)19:17 No. 356446 ID: c811c4
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>"Hey! I'd like a drink. Here's one gold piece, is that alright?" Muo asks.
>"Sure, knock yourself out. Don't drink the whole supply, now."
>"And.. how about a couple more gold pieces for, uh... a little privacy?"
>"... whyyyyyyy?
>"It's- it's really personal! A slime like me drinking is actually really embarrasing!"
>"Ya know what? Sure. Just don't tell me why, when I think about it. Long as your gold is good."

3/3 Tom 2011/10/06(Thu)19:18 No. 356447 ID: c811c4
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>Then...

Muo casts Random Effect Lv2 on the Well Water

Jello pudding.

Dwarf Piss

>>356447
Water elemental, predisposed to think of Muo as its mother but with the personality of someone just entering their rebellious teenage years.

elven holy water.

sea water

>>356453
Supporting dwarf piss, just to initiate the whole proceedings of the goblins against the dorfs.

>>356459
Be sure to have a note or something identifying it as dwarven piss.

>>356460

Indeed. Dwarf Piss.

Be sure to give Muo a "surprise/shock" emotion so she can genuinely fake it so they won't suspect her of just screwing with the water.

>>356453
>>356467
Sewer Brew covers both of these bases.

Dwarven piss, laced with Dwarven ale.

extremely strong alcoholic beverage that tastes exactly like water. we want the goblins acting funny not dying of thirst.

How about a yellow, sweet tasting, citrus-flavoured drink, that decomposes after 2 hours into dwarf piss?

>>356470
sure.

How about we just make the water taste like a dwarf pissed in it, but its actually harmless, normal water that just tastes nasty?

Their piss is alcoholic enough already. And, we dont want the gobbos dying of water poisoning before the fun can begin.

>>356470
Have to go with this.

>>356470
This. This piss this is neither entertaining nor profitable.

GEE
SLIME WITH WAND WANDERS INTO GOBLIN FORT
ASKS TO SEE THE WELL
WELL IS FILLED WITH PISS
!?!?!?!?!
FUCK THE DWARVES

>>356470
This.

Oh Muo you are having entirely too much fun.

LSD. LSD in the water.

>>356483
Yes, LSD. That's even better than alcohol. I change my vote.

LSD jello pudding that tastes like dwarf piss? This is just getting silly. I do really like the idea of altering their state of mind, however. Certainly chaotic.

LSD sounds like the best.

LSD and then Lagotrope can just scribble in rainbow colors on the canvas for every panel for a while.

Not LSD in the water, cus it will only last a few seconds. Make a chaos divine element that when comes into contact with water causes a chain reaction that produces LSD. When the chaos-god element fades from existence the LSD remains.

LSD And/or aphrodisiacs.

LSD

oh my god we might as well rename this drug quest

1/2 Tom 2011/10/07(Fri)01:49 No. 356521 ID: c811c4
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Water now gives effects similar to LSD

>I'm going to go indoors for a bit, and try to introduce myself so I'm not completely unfamiliar. Tom, that water won't be completely ruined, will it?

"Nono, I'm not the god of pestilence. The effect on the water will wear off after some time.

A Dorf. or a kitten. or a Dorfish kitten. Dorf-fish-kitten. Yes this one

2/2 Tom 2011/10/07(Fri)01:54 No. 356525 ID: c811c4
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rolled 75 = 75

---

2 hours later

>From what I gathered, before people had a bunch of water, there are around 50 goblins that live here.

>"Hehe you're all slimy and slippery, what are you?!" the nearest goblin says.
>"I'm a slimegirl, and thank you!"
>"Wow, you're exactly what you sound like! Slimy and a girl!"

>"WHAT IS GOING ON. WHY ARE YOU ALL ACTING SILLY. GET TO WORK, GOBLINS." a voice booms in a couple of rooms over.
>"Ah, who is that?!" Muo asks.
>"Oh, that's just like.. the demon. Man he sounds even more pissed than usual, but heh, I'm tripping a little here so maybe not."

>Uh oh uh oh! I think he's coming this way!

Polymorph Casted on Muo

A little change, this time! 60 is now equal strength for Muo, but otherwise it works the same. The higher, the stronger. Name a creature, if you please.

>>356525
>Stronger

Hmmmmm...

How about a... uh, succubus? You know, like Minci!

>>356523
THEY TOLD ME I WAS CRAZY WHEN I SAID I COULD SEE INTO THE FUTURE. MY RAMBLING SUGGESTIONS HAVE MORE CREDIBILITY THAN EVER AHAHAH.

>>356523

this. including the beard.