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File 169757551263.png - (204.94KB , 600x600 , Rococoa title.png )
1074913 No. 1074913 ID: 3ea497

An Asteroid Quest-inspired story, written by someone who never got around to reading the damn thing.

Content warning: contains crude language, crude drawings, off-color humor, inaccurate lore galore and is hosted on Questden, which is even worse.
35 posts omitted. Last 50 shown. Expand all images
>>
No. 1075638 ID: 3ea497
File 169829744244.png - (165.40KB , 600x600 , Rococoa 15.png )
1075638

You suddenly remember you are pretty big and are carrying two bags.
>>
No. 1075639 ID: 3ea497
File 169829748627.png - (179.21KB , 600x600 , Rococoa 16.png )
1075639

After some pushing and climbing down, you get out into the little alleyway and you notice a couple things.

The first is of course the freaking salikai parsing through a trashcan, apparently oblivious to both you and the large pile of other trash and random debris accumulated in the opposite wall.

Beside the trash pile there is what appears to be a pomni hobo, who seems pretty startled upon seeing a Rokoa clone climbing out the window.

Finally, you also notice two exits, one on each side of the alleyway, probably leading to opposite sides of the block.


Seems there is plenty fun to be had around this little part of town.

What do you wanna do?
>>
No. 1075641 ID: fa6745

>>1075639
Your hands are clean but your clothes are still bloody and tattered
Switch them with the pomni, who doesn't want evidence-covered clothes?
also the freaking salikai must be hungry, offer food in exchange for goods and services
>>
No. 1075642 ID: 273c18

There's no way that pomni has clothes big enough for you.
Prank the Salikai by yanking on its tail then run off through an alley.
>>
No. 1075643 ID: 8f9bc4

this...isn't a war-torn city at all, is it.

it's just a city.
>>
No. 1075662 ID: 3ad018

Drape an arm over the saikai companionably. "Hey there new friend, you look like someone who needs to get out of the city. Lucky you that I came by."
>>
No. 1075767 ID: 3ea497
File 169850846315.png - (359.36KB , 600x600 , Rococoa 17.png )
1075767

>This….isn’t a war-torn city at all…. It’s just a city.

Not every part of a city gets hit the same way.

We haven’t even left this building block yet. You should see the outskirts.

Still, the fact that at least some of the plumbing systems are still working and the response teams came back after an hour or so of the Rokoas leaving means Shield Alliance did its money’s worth defending this place. Seems you and the other few neumonos that got caught and turned to clones were just unlucky.


Or pretty lucky, because now you get to do this.

>Switch clothes with the Pomni.

Your clothes or your spleen, clownface.
>>
No. 1075768 ID: 3ea497
File 169850854329.png - (119.04KB , 600x600 , Rococoa 18.png )
1075768

The pomi quickly takes off his garb, tosses it at you and runs past the salikai guy and towards the streets before you get a change to hand him your bloodstained shirt.

The garb is pretty small for you, but you put it over your head anyway, wearing it around your upper torso the galaxy’s tiniest poncho.


>Prank the salikai by yanking his tail

You do exactly this, making the serpentine weirdo turn around to look at you.
>>
No. 1075769 ID: 3ea497
File 169850870349.png - (128.31KB , 600x600 , Rococoa 19.png )
1075769

>Drape an arm over the saikai companionably and say:

"Hey there new friend, you look like someone who needs to get out of the city. Lucky you that I came by."
>>
No. 1075770 ID: 3ea497
File 169850871599.png - (127.92KB , 600x600 , Rococoa 20.png )
1075770

>>
No. 1075771 ID: 3ea497
File 169850872621.png - (128.31KB , 600x600 , Rococoa 19.png )
1075771

>>
No. 1075772 ID: 3ea497
File 169850875307.png - (134.41KB , 600x600 , Rococoa 21.png )
1075772

“Hi, hi! So great to see someone so eager to lend their services! Especially in these troubled times!”

“I’m actually sifting through the trash for parts in my newest project. You interested in taking part on creating a new lifeform?”
>>
No. 1075773 ID: 8f9bc4

Oh no it's talking to you.
>>
No. 1075774 ID: 19ea25

So long as it isn't another Rokoa. It'd be great. Talk shop and see what this one can offer.
>>
No. 1075775 ID: d7dae2

A new lifeform? oh no is he going to create competition for you?
But i say hear him out first atleast, you wouldnt punch a guy with glasses right?
>>
No. 1075777 ID: 3ea497
File 169852399804.png - (147.69KB , 600x600 , Rococoa 22.png )
1075777

“It’s not a Rokoa clone, is it?”, you ask.

“Oh, goodness, no!” the jolly green serpentine exclaims, “Nothing so dangerous, and especially not so unoriginal. Uh, no offense.”

“Whatever,” you shrug.

“Anyway, what I’m looking to create is, as you can probably guess, the ultimate trash mammal. A creature that is made of selected trash elements that can subsist and thrive in among trash matter.”

“If I can create such a creature, I will be able to use it as a basis for a self-sufficient ecosystem that only requires trash as its base food source. I could even go further and apply it as means of safe natural recycling system-wide!”

“I had already being collecting prime matter when you guys began attackin, I know it’s a bit soon for most to return to their lives, but that gives me a great opportunity to search for more materials unmolested, and there is so much more of it now! I’m mostly looking for organic and mineral items that are both large and distinctive enough to trash. A bodyguard like you would be excellent for the job, and there is a nice amount of Zeny in it, too, what do you say?”

Oh, good. He stopped talking.

“How much Zeny?” you ask.

“Oh, silly me. I forgot to give the price!" he rubs the back of his head with one of his pincers, "2,000 per day of work, plus 2,000 more per decent material found. Might even give you a bonus if you help find something extraordinary. You in?”


You in?

>Refuse (look through trash heap/leave alley/ climb different window instead)

>Haggle

>Accept (suggest iconic trash item/common city district to go searching in)

>Eat?
>>
No. 1075788 ID: 19ea25

Accept: Given the types of trash and given how things are broken down.. All these broken down buildings are considered trash, mineral waste, piping, all such things are worthwhile! Not to mention the stuff within like wood and all that construction material. Lets find the most bombed out area and scavenge.
>>
No. 1075789 ID: 0b594e

accept, at least until he leads you back to his hideout.
>>
No. 1075819 ID: 6e8599

He wants trash? Repeat that idea of his back to him.
>>
No. 1088878 ID: a8545d
File 171323131715.png - (199.68KB , 888x681 , Rococoa 23.png )
1088878

>Repeat that back to him.

“Let me get this straight, you want trash?”

“Yes.” He says all cheery-like.

“You….want….trash.”

“Affirmative.”

“….To create mammals.”

“I know! I know! It’s far-fetched, but that’s the point! We salikai dedicate ourselves to new avenues of research and the research of new avenues. What kind of scientist would I be if I didn’t thread uncharted territory?”

“And you’ll pay 2,000 zeny a day for an assistant?”

“And 2,000 more for each scavenged material that stands out, let’s not forget that additional deal-sweetener!”

“Damn, you must have deep pockets! Alright, I’m in!”

“Great! We can get started right away! The city outskirts are not far and would make an idyllic place to begin our search!”

“Sure, if you say so, but uhh, I just broke off from the Rokoa army and the folk outside the alley may not like me much.”

“A small setback, I’ll admit, but no worries! I’ve got a means to deal with such an issue!”
>>
No. 1088879 ID: a8545d
File 171323137777.png - (591.87KB , 1982x956 , Rococoa 24.png )
1088879

“-I threw my coat at her and ran off. There was also another guy in there, one of those long green aliens with lots of pincers, but he was rummaging through to trash, so he didn’t see her. That was like five minutes ago. Please go there, I don’t know if the poor fella’s still alive!”
>>
No. 1088880 ID: a8545d
File 171323145273.png - (231.41KB , 788x600 , Rococoa 25.png )
1088880

“WHAM! Eat knuckle-sandwich, knuckle-brain!”
>>
No. 1088881 ID: a8545d
File 171323161785.png - (108.49KB , 600x600 , Rococoa 26.png )
1088881

You swoop past the flabbergasted PMCs on Suss Suss the ssalikai sscientisst’ss ssuper duper sssssCAI rocket and make for the city outskirts like comet that’s having the runs. In a few minutes, you reach your destination.

And here we are: the outskirts, the outer layer of buildings and neighborhoods that divide the city from the greater countryside!

Or what’s left of it anyway. Man, what a mess.

The small apartment block you were before looked largely fine, but that’s because you broke free from the Rokoa hivemind like an hour prior and wandered as far away from the retreating army as you could, right into the limit of where the Rokoa army got before they were pushed back. This is where the real action happened.

The clone army bombarded the city prior to the ground assault and the missile interceptors prioritized protecting the bulk of the infrastructure downtown, leaving the edge of town to be thoroughly totaled. In other words:

“A treasure trove of trash, if there ever was one! Come assistant, let us pick a pile and start digging.”

“Name’s Roko, buddy. If you keep calling me assistant, it’s gonna get old pretty fast!”

“My apologies, Miss Roko. I’m just giddy looking all this huge mounds of debris for us to lay our hands on.”

“Rrright… Hey, shouldn’t you turn that rocket back into a tiny orb or whatever?”

“It’s quite fine. If someone gets the password wrong three times in the control panel, it blows up.”

“Cool.”
>>
No. 1088882 ID: a8545d
File 171323171515.png - (237.54KB , 889x600 , Rococoa 27.png )
1088882

“Ah, the fresh smell of carbonized concrete! I think this only-half-leveled block is a good place to start. Hmm, though the one in front of it has more smoldering corpses. We could on one block of buildings at a time, and hopefully dig something up faster, or try to cover more ground by working separately. The virtues of cooperation! What say you, Miss Roko?”


What say you, Miss Roko?

>Search through the half-leveled buildings.

>Search the block with extra smoldering corpses.


And should you…?

>Search with Ssus Ssus.

>Search on your own.


Current inventory: (1) List of aliens for you to eat; (2) pens; (1) sheaf of boring documents; a pack with (10) remaining cigarettes; a snack bag with (1) remaining yich; (2) kilos of meat and fruit; (1) set of silverware cutlery.
>>
No. 1088894 ID: 8f9bc4

Can you tell what any of the corpses are? Might tick a few items off your list.
>>
No. 1088895 ID: 5ebd37

Do corpses count as trash? Check the no corpse building.
How is a rocket going to help you rummage through trash? Does it have fancy scanners or something? I guess carry it around and see what it can do.
>>
No. 1088907 ID: 80c73b

Is "half burnt" and/or "owners are dead" sufficient to count as trash? Otherwise we're probably still going to need to look for dumpsters and trashcans - though at least we'll have easier access to inside trashcans here.

>>1088895
I think they just rode the rocket here, and they've "parked" it.
>>
No. 1089088 ID: b2fb15
File 171341819156.png - (174.58KB , 600x600 , Rococoa 28.png )
1089088

>Check the no corpses building.

Eh, it was a big building. It’s likely got bodies buried underneath.


Speaking of which, you tell Suss Suss you’ll be checking out that block and start digging through the rubble. You don’t tell him whether you want to do it alone so he quickly joins you, tossing up chunks of debris in a nearby corner.

Your powerful Rokoa physique helps you dig quite fast, but it is quite a large set of structures you are rummaging through, so you dig and dig until nightfall, stopping only for a short snack, and to occasionally ask Ssus Ssus to asses one of your finds, most of which turn out, says him, unremarkable.
>>
No. 1089089 ID: b2fb15
File 171341824729.png - (183.70KB , 600x600 , Rococoa 29.png )
1089089

At the end of the day, you gather up the few items that seem to be of any real worth, at least by deranged green noodle scientist standards: a largely intact chuck of kitchen piping; an undetonated Rokoa Conversion Payload, A.K.A. a bomb meant to release a swarm of nanites to turn nearby neumonos into Rokoa clones; and lastly, a dead patatoos, a small alien mammal largely seen as pests, yet occasionally bred and raised as pets (accent on the “oos”).
>>
No. 1089090 ID: b2fb15
File 171341829544.png - (198.86KB , 600x600 , Rococoa 30.png )
1089090

Holy Neumolly! The little critter wasn’t dead!

You remember now that patatooses have the capacity to enter a death-like state as a defense mechanism when facing highly stressing life-threatening situations. The miraculously intact house pet opens its mouth contentedly and waves at you with its tail-hand, which is perfect for climbing, hanging, and friendly waving.

-“I think I’ve got all I could from this patch of junk,” you say, admiring your finds for a moment, “What about you, science-boy?”
>>
No. 1089091 ID: b2fb15
File 171341844996.png - (127.60KB , 600x600 , Rococoa 31.png )
1089091

-“I found the basis for the reproductory system!”

-“Man, that shit’s nasty!

-“Quite. Just the kind of find of I was looking for!”

-“Just… If you want me to carry in my bag, put it there yourself. I’m not touching it.”

-“Fair enough. I also found some scotch tape. Lots and lots of scotch tape. Like, a whole crate. It should do in a pinch once the duct tape runs out.”

-“Sure. Say, is your lab/base/mom’s basement far from here? I don’t think this bomb’s gonna fit on your rocket.”

-“Certainly not. Which leaves us we a bit of a conundrum. A crossroads, if you will.”

-“What kinda crossroads?”

-“Well, we can either return to my laboratory now and gather our strength for tomorrow, which would be ideal if it weren’t for the fact this place will likely be swarming with rescue services and volunteers, not to mention Shield Alliance security patrols, or we could drag the confounded thing all the way to my base right now, which presents its own kind of problem.”

-“I’m a bit tired, but I can still haul this thing outta here right now if I have to. No biggie.”

-“It’s not just tiredness I’m talking about. This city was dangerous, even before the clone army was put into the equation. If we spend the night moving this piece of ordinance, we may run into some nasty customers. Bands of robbers, looters and the like. And who knows whether the Rokoa army isn’t planning a renewed surprise assault at this very moment?”

After unclenching your teeth from having to listen to Suss Suss’ annoying nerdy voice so long, you ponder the situation and the options presented. A moment later, you make your choice.


You decide to:

>Go back to Suss Suss’ lab right away and brave the city outskirts again in the morning.

>Drag all the junk back to the lab during nighttime, to whatever consequence that might bring.
>>
No. 1089095 ID: 5ebd37

Why not leave the bomb, do you even want it? It won't work on Ssus Ssus to make him less nerdy so toss it and take the small stuff back.
>>
No. 1089096 ID: 80c73b

Assuming you do care about the bomb, then yeah, drag it back. I don't feel like we're the kind of person to go home because it might get dangerous.
>>
No. 1090116 ID: b2fb15
File 171461593959.png - (447.93KB , 1000x651 , Rococoa 32.png )
1090116

>Quitting or gritting
You momentarily consider ditching the bomb and just making your way back to your pointdexter pal’s place without it, but then remember that A) you get 2 extra grand for every cool piece of loot you bring back, and B) you are fricking Roko Rockatansky; you pull jobs like this for breakfast, you can damn well pull one for dinner.

-“Yeah, let’s go now. Dealing with the morning crowd’s a hassle.”

-“Too right!” Suss Suss laughs, “Let’s go then, I’ll carry some of the smaller items.”


A bunch of scotch tape and half an hour later, you walk the long way back to Suss Suss’ hideout, your arm joints and shoulder blades aching from the strain.

Your nerdy employer scuttles in front of you, carrying some of the burden on his back, his now miniaturized rocket ship hovering over one of his foreclaws.

-“Hey, how far away was this lab of yours anyway?”

-“Oh, not too far! It should be about, say, five hours from here at a brisk pace.”

-“Oomph! Did you have to set shop that frickin far?”

-“Well, there was a reason why I was offering 2,000 zeny a day, in spite of this being a purely scientific undertaking.”

-“How do you even afford stunts like this?”

-“Oh, I generally resort to the crude method of selling practical gizmos and various drugs that I know how to make.”

-“Illegal drugs?

-“Only in some star systems.”

-“In this star system?

-“….Yeah……..Anyway, if we continue walking at this pace, we should be arriving before sunrise. We can then have nice meal and a shower, my treat of course, before hitting the sack for a few hours, and then the true work will-“
>>
No. 1090117 ID: b2fb15
File 171461598344.png - (464.39KB , 1000x651 , Rococoa 33.png )
1090117

You hear two shots ring out as Suss Suss’ right side erupts with dual pinpricks of blood.
His scream is a mix of wounded beast and shocked scientist. It is annoying yet cathartic all at once.
>>
No. 1090118 ID: b2fb15
File 171461604543.png - (306.36KB , 728x600 , Rococoa 34.png )
1090118

You swiftly lay down the bomb and turn towards the direction of the shots, and see quartet of strolling forward and posing dramatically. You shake your fist at them so angrily you can almost see the onomatopoeia hovering over it.


Aside from the cowgirl with the gun, the others seem to be barely armed and wearing ramshackle armor. Makes sense a bunch of looters wouldn’t have much money to buy proper… wait, is that-?

Shit! That little Pomi guy’s got an energy rifle! He’s probably the damn leader of these chucklefucks. You can’t be sure if it’s the kind of weapon that burns your flesh or disintegrates you altogether, but judging by the way it crackles with energy, it’s bad news either way.

The smug-faced bozo takes a few steps forward as he takes a better look at you.

-“Well, well, well, what do we have here?”

-“Why are there three wells here, boss?” the belenosian with the pipe asks.

-“Eh, this was probably the shanty town. Corpo never invested enough to add indoor plumbing around, the cheapskates.”

-“Hey, you shmucks owe me a new client!” you say.

-“And you owe us a city, you giant clone bitch!”

-“Compared to you, everything is giant!” you smirk. You are almost disappointed when no one reacts to that sick burn.

-“Do I kill her now, boss?” Said the belenosian with the still-smoking gun.

-“Naw, save the bullets. Let’s let a pro deal with this copypaste fatass. Get her, Skitters!”
>>
No. 1090119 ID: b2fb15
File 171461632604.png - (312.35KB , 728x600 , Rococoa 35.png )
1090119

“SKREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE”

Okay, some ground rules about the combat in Red-Eyed Blues:

Each combat encounter is divided by turns.

Each turn, the suggestors write things that Roko should do in order to gain an edge/defeat an enemy/win the fight.

And then I write her doing it.

Got that? Good.

GO!

>>
No. 1090121 ID: 19ea25

Given his momentum it means that he needs to ensure a proper hit to do damage. The best way to deal with that is to grab him by one of his limbs and fling him like a toy.
>>
No. 1090122 ID: 8f9bc4

Nerd is down. He better not keep his brain meats in his head.

>>1090119

Tell Skitters that his snout is too short. The sense of crippling inadequacy should take him out of the fight.
>>
No. 1090130 ID: 5ebd37

>>1090121
yeah, grab him, swing him around you and launch him at the pomi
>>
No. 1090132 ID: fc100b

FLING FLING FLING
>>
No. 1090282 ID: 47c854

One fork three knives? He must like eating species too! Offer an ear and half the aliens you plan to eat to get him to swap sides.
>>
No. 1090733 ID: b2fb15
File 171545600904.png - (247.26KB , 600x600 , Rococoa 36.png )
1090733

>One fork three knives? He must like eating species too! Offer an ear and half the aliens you plan to eat to get him to swap sides.

You consider doing this but then realize he can just have [i]both[/s] your ears and the rest of you too, if he stays fighting 5 against 1.
Well, it might be 5 against 2, but that pet you picked earlier is likely playing dead again.


You put your arm in front of you defensively and the little gremlin land squarely on it as he begins to slice and stab madly at you with all four arms. In just two seconds flat, the damn bug guy has sunk his blades and cutlery around 12 times into your body.

Your uniform and the coat you politely borrowed earlier absorb some of the damage, but most of them stabs draw at least some blood. The kicker being when the guy’s cleaver pierces deep into the top of your head, sending crimson flying forwards and running down your brow. Fortunately, he doesn’t manage to pull it back out instantly, giving precious moments to retaliate before he screws your skull any worse.


>Nerd is down. He better not keep his brain meats in his head.

He very well better do! You did not spend the better part a day rummaging rubble and carrying live ordinance for no pay!

Also, crossing aliens off the list isn’t as fun if you didn’t croak them yourself.


>Grab him, swing him around you and launch him at the pomi.

>FLING FLING FLING

Done and Done.
>>
No. 1090734 ID: b2fb15
File 171545607178.png - (217.46KB , 600x600 , Rococoa 37.png )
1090734

You lift your free hand and full grab him by his lower half, after which you spin full circle and fling right back at his lizardly boss.


“Your nose is shooort!” you yell as you let him fly.

As he soars through the air, you see him using his upper arms to covering his snout self-consciously. Guess it really was that important to him.
>>
No. 1090735 ID: b2fb15
File 171545610404.png - (317.73KB , 744x786 , Rococoa 38.png )
1090735

Strike!


Well, not quite. But the little pomi guy gets hit square in the chest by your impromptu projectile, sending them both falling backwards onto ground, to the shock of his two belenosian gorillas. Cutlery flies everywhere. Hopefully one of them left a nasty mark on the bandit boss before he gets back up and decides you are literally worth a shot of his energy gun.
>>
No. 1090737 ID: b2fb15
File 171545629150.png - (682.19KB , 1200x1200 , Rococoa 39.png )
1090737

“Right, my turn,” The belenosian with the pipe says.

“Let me just shoot her already!” says the one with the gun.

“Naw, I can do better than just put a hole in her skull. ‘sides, I wanna test this baby out.”


Man, these guys are really cocky. They actually keep sending one guy at a time. And with a fricking lead pipe, of all things. Hurt and losing eyesight as you are, you still can believe they are that dumb.
>>
No. 1090738 ID: b2fb15
File 171545633862.png - (751.84KB , 1200x1200 , Rococoa 40.png )
1090738

*WHIIIRR* *WHIIIRR*


Curse this dastardly space future we live in.

I mean present.

What now?
>>
No. 1090739 ID: 5ebd37

Being a neumono, this weapon is less of a threat to you than he might think. Just punt it right out of his hands. A little pain will be worth seeing the look on his face.
>>
No. 1090745 ID: 80c73b

"Curse this dastardly space future we live in." Heheueuhehoohoo

Got anything that could tangle up the blades? Anything especially fibrous; any e.g. dead bodies with long hair around, or cables (structural or data) lying discarded? If not, I guess the main goal is to get control of the weapon, ideally without getting the cutty bits applied to us.
>>
No. 1090822 ID: dd3fe0

Wow. This moron has forgotten several important facts. Namely:

-Circular saws are horrible melee weapons. They are made for cutting *wood*. They jam easily, they get dislodged easily, they require a slow press motion to saw things, most motors people use for making them run have inherent safety features that are designed to minimize injury, especially if cloth gets tangled in them, or something jams the belt, or etc. etc. Now, there ARE designs for robust circular saw weapons useful in melee fights (mostly in rules heavy robot vs robot sports which ban cloth armor), but this design, blatantly, is NOT one of those!

-You don't bring overly complex, gimmicky weapons to a real fight. They don't work well, they break easily, they're unwieldy as fuck.

-You ESPECIALLY don't bring poorly designed motorized fake melee 'weapons' to a fight with a NEUMONO! The correct way to fight a Neumono in melee if one MUST do so, is to bring a BUNCH of people with some sort of traditional, robust, HEFTY POLEARMS, and to attack the Neumono all at once!

Show them the error of their ways!
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